30 September 2008

Good news!

Fantastic news. Oh, snap. This is just fantastic. Brilliant. I can hardly contain myself.

I think my financial problems are over.

I don't want to jinx it or anything. Nothing's definite yet. The money's not in my pocket. But from the information I have so far, things look good. As I understand it, I stand to take in somewhere in the neighborhood of $500,000. I think. It might only be half that at first. But either way, I'm not going to have to worry about money again for a while. I can pay off my student loans and my credit cards and buy a new EGR valve for my car... hell, I can buy a new car! I'll be rich!

At first I was mad at the guy in front of me on the freeway offramp. He could have made it through the yellow; in fact, he seemed to have stopped on a green light. But I owe my financial upswing to him. If he hadn't stopped, I wouldn't have stopped behind him. And if I hadn't stopped behind him, I wouldn't have seen the sign in the gravel right next to the offramp:

"Get rich buying and selling real estate! Make $250,000-$500,000 this year! Call 480-XXX-XXXX!"

I haven't called yet, of course, but I'm sure that if I do I'm well on my way to financial prosperity.

Yeah. And if you believe that, I've got a bridge in Brooklyn I can sell you.
In fact, that's the first sale I'm going to make on my way to real estate millions.