New Year’s resolution: edit my vocabulary

I should have expected it, really. 2008 was both an Olympic year and a presidential election year. It was bound to happen. It does every year. But this year was worse.

I am of course talking about overused words and phrases. Each year has its list – things that everyone is tired of hearing about but will talk about anyway. I’d imagine that my list is a little different than others’. I’m much more easily annoyed. But short fuse or not, there are a lot of things I’m sick of hearing, and I’m hoping that by listing them here, I can help raise awareness and expunge them from our social consciousness. And so here they are, in no particular order.

1. The Economy
2. Michael Phelps
3. Obama (I’m sick of hearing his name and he’s not even sworn in yet)
4. Joe the Plumber
5. Bailout
6. Miley Cyrus and/or Hannah Montana
7. Brangelina
8. Uncool (I’m looking at you, Aniston)
9. Britney Spears (she’s crazy, she’s not crazy, she’s crazy, she’s not crazy … how about we leave her alone and let her decide which it is?)
10. Jonas Brothers (that number on the tag of your jeans? That’s supposed to be waist size, not age)
11. Baby bump (if an actress has a decent meal, she's pregnant. If an actress had a baby two months ago and hasn't lost every pregnancy pound, she's pregnant. If an actress has a steady boyfriend, she's pregnant. How about we shut up and let them decide if they are or not?)
12. Lohan (any of them)
13. Pregnant man
14. Gas prices
15. Heath Ledger (can’t we let the man rest in peace already?)
16. SNL and/or Tina Fey
17. The Hills
18. Madonna (why is she still news?)
19. Paris Hilton (why is she EVER news?)
20. Twilight/Breaking Dawn/Robert Pattinson/etc etc etc

I’m sure I’ve missed one or two but those are the first ones that came to mind. Here’s hoping 2009 will be a Phelps-free, Miley-free, economic-crisis-free year.